I’m not talking about anxiety over vaccinations. I know about that. My husband already had his first shot, and he is still afraid that it will somehow poison him. He had it done at work, with lots of pressure. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have done it.

My son comes up with lamer and lamer reasons not to have his.

But I was not fearful of my vaccination. And I was right not to worry. I had the first one yesterday morning, and it didn’t hurt. I didn’t die, either. I haven’t even had any side effects.

I think my husband will make it through, too. And my son.

But I am suffering from anxiety.

First off, April is filled with stressful stuff. Taxes, vaccinations, my husband’s citizenship appointment, trying to settle my mother’s estate, zoom meetings, I don’t know — just a bunch of things that require me to do things to which I have aversions.

Then this week included not just a bunch of that stuff, but also driving. I have hardly driven at all for the past year. Driving means the possibility of getting lost, and driving on unfamiliar roads also means the possibility of scary roads.

Yeah, none of that is rational. In the real world, I went to get my vaccination yesterday and ran into a friend with whom I spent my 15 minutes waiting to make sure I didn’t die. I got home and worked, and then had #1 son’s birthday dinner and cake with quite a bit of my family.

This morning I slept in till 7:00 and gave myself a slow start to the day just in case I had a reaction to the vaccine, which I did not. After lunch, I went to pick up my biggest granddaughter from school. There were not scary roads on the way, and I left so early (in case of emergencies) that I had time to read two issues of The Economist while I waited for her. I had a nice talk with her and with my son, and then came homeland got some work done.

So I spent several hours experiencing pointless and inappropriate anxiety. Nothing bad happened. I had no need for flight or fight.

Now I am exhausted. I feel tired and weak.

But I survivied.