Buckingham’s point about women’s lower level of happiness when they have fewer choices isn’t a plea to return to a more traditional way of life. Instead, he’s saying something about choices: the more possibilities you have, the less likely you are to be able to make a choice without regret.
CD agrees with him, and she’s a counselor, so she should know.
Buckingham’s point is that we should identify our strengths, recognize our “strong moments,” and intentionally imbalance our lives by paying more attention to the things that make us feel strong and less atttention to the things that make us feel weak.
For me, the strong moments when I get to figure out a plan for a client should get more attention — and so should the strong moments when I’m revelling in knitting and a novel. The weak moments when I’m panicking over a site’s late launch or a client’s failure to pay me? They shouldn’t get attention.
In a relationship, he says, there are going to be imperfections. You don’t have to deny them — but you also don’t have to analyze them and obssess over them. Instead, analyze and obssess over the strong moments in the relationship, and you’ll find that those strong moments will increase and the weak moments will lessen.
If there are no strong moments in a job, relationship, or volunteer position, then Buckingham says to “relinquish it.”
This reminds me of Suzette Haden Elgins’s “Whatever you feed will grow” principle.
Buckingham also offers a complement to the Strengthsfinder superpowers test: a life roles test for women.
I came up as Teacher and Creator, which was not astonishing to me. Check it out and tell me whether you felt that the test pinpointed you.
I’m an Influencer and Teacher.
Motivator & Advisor aka cheerleader & bff to all
Hi!
I haven’t taken the test yet, but I ran into something upsetting today, and I was hoping you could give me a clue on how to deal with this.
All I’m asking is that you take a look at my other blog and see what you think. I’m not asking you to take a lot of time on this.
When I click on my other blog (www.jam2day.blogspot.com) It comes up for about 4 or 5 seconds, and then there is a warning that comes up saying that my blog is infected with malware and that you shouldn’t look at it because it will destroy your computer.
The warning says it’s from Google, but it occurred to me that it could just be a phishing scheme of some sort. I’ve been trying to check with Google rather than following the link.
I never put bad stuff up there that I know of, and I don’t know what to do to fix it.
I know you sometimes do free work, and I can’t afford to pay, and I don’t want you to spend much time on it. I’m feeling a little frantic at the moment and don’t know what to do, though. If you can point me in the right direction to fix the problem (if there is one), I’d really appreciate it.
@lostarts –
Nothing comes up on my computer, and blogspot’s very clean, so I’d say you’ve got something on the computer you’re using, not on your site. Is this your new computer? And did you clean it before using it? If you don’t have a lot of files on it, just initialize it and start over. If there’s a lot, then your local hardware guys can probably fix it for you for a reasonable price. Good luck!
My new computer hasn’t been delivered yet, so it’s not that. The computer I’m getting the warning on is a Mac, and although that doesn’t mean it’s impossible that there’s something wrong with it, it seems far less likely, especially since it doesn’t happen with any other site except one.
The info I have been able to get from Google so far mentions that the problem could be with something else I have a link to on the blog. I’ve been clicking on links, and so far, my counter brings up the same warning. I’ve eliminated the counter. I don’t know if that will help. I just restarted my browser and I’m about to check and see if that eliminated the problem.
Thanks so much for taking the time to look and reply.
I really hope it’s not my computer!