It is the first day of school . My youngest is starting at the high school. This means that I am slightly nervous for him. Actually, I always am slightly nervous on the first day of school, until I hear from my kids that they had a good day. I am not as nervous as I was on their first day of kindergarten, but it is the same sort of feeling.
I have the house to myself. Obviously, I am going to clean the house before work, since it will not be filled with messy boys all day. I’ll get back to the gym tomorrow, or possibly after I’ve had a day off. If I clean the house very vigorously, I may be able to consider it exercise.
The Wall Street Journal had its approximately-annual report on happiness. Money doesn’t buy it, in case you were wondering. People living on less than $20,000 p.a. are less happy than the rest of us — and it startles me that this figure hasn’t changed in the 20 years since I first read it. Apparently, $20 K is what it takes to live happily in the United States. People making over $90,000 a year consistently report themselves as happier than those making under $20,000, but there are no other significant differences correlating happiness with income. And when those making $90,000 a year were asked not to rate their general level of happiness, but to state how they felt at a given time, they were more likely to report feeling angry or anxious than happy.
It used to be that just over 1/3 of Americans reported themselves as “very happy,” and now it is just under 1/3. This may merely reflect the growing poverty rate under Mr. Bush, showing the shift of more folks into the “unhappy” under-$20,000 group.
Yet research has pretty consistently agreed that people’s external circumstances affect their happiness only briefly.
I figure that anyone living on minimum wage in the U.S. (this translates to a little less than $10 K p.a., so even two full-time minimum-wage jobs won’t boost you into the happier group) has to deal with little irritations all the time. They can’t afford a car, or if they can, they can’t afford to maintain it. They can’t fix or replace broken appliances, their housing situation is shaky, their neighborhoods are scary, their utilities are always on the verge of being turned off, they face little humiliations and inconveniences all the time. Thus, their bouts of unhappiness in response to circumstances are closer together than those of more affluent people.
The Journal didn’t spend much time speculating on why poor people might be less happy, but they did have an idea about a factor that seems to affect the happiness of richer people. Specifically, commuting. Having a long commute is one of the best predictors for unhappiness. This is because, as they put it, “traffic is a new hell every day.” So, the temporary unhappiness created by circumstances comes up anew each day, as some new inconvenience arises. Kind of like being poor.
#1 son is driving #2 son to school, now that they are at the same school. I’ve made a deal with them to contribute to their gas money as long as they keep excellent grades. We can look at their grades online, so they have agreed to show me their grades every Friday. This keeps them from the horror of riding the bus. I always rode the bus, so I don’t know what the big deal is, and I have never bribed a kid for grades before, but I have agreed to this. They waited until I had not had a day off in two weeks, and had a broken refrigerator and a broken computer. In this weakened state, I agreed to the mad plan in question. It was presented as my helping them to achieve their goal of having excellent grades this year for the sake of their college applications by keeping them from having to take jobs and/or have a long bus ride which would interfere with their study time, not as a bribe.
At this point, I might agree to anything, so I guess I should be thankful that it wasn’t worse.
Your kids have excellent negotiation skills. I really detested the bus as a kid. The fumes made me sick, and I feel a little guilty that I make my kids ride. They don’t mind though, and I get ridiculously bad gas mileage. I simply can’t afford to drive them and sit in idle for 20+ minutes four times a day. It would make me a little nauseous to do that to the planet anyway.
Interesting thoughts on money and happiness. I think poverty causes unhappiness for all the reasons you mentioned. Even living slightly above your means is constantly frustrating. When we were able to live significantly below our means, we were significantly happier for it. That’s a good goal. I am frightened about the commute though. I am looking at a thirty minute commute right now, no matter where I find work. I really hate driving too. I don’t know why, I used to love it!
I hope you get all your inconveniences straightened out soon. That kind of thing can make you so tired.
my oldest boy was headed towards a “freshman survival skills” thing today at the high school and both my husband and i were slightly nervous for him. dh called and said, “that is a big school….and those kids are HUGE….” i keep telling myself that he’ll be fine. that he’s done some challenging things this summer that will perhaps make the transition a little less stressful, but in ther end it’s still my boy i’m sending into the lion’s den.
All this about school is making me feel old.
Want to see why? Check out the following statement:
When I was in school, the Fall term never started before Labor Day.
It’s true, but see what I mean?
And yet I’ve discovered I rather enjoy taking the bus now. We used to alternate between catching the bus and walking to school when we were at intermediate school (11 to 12 years old), we were about 3 miles away from the school. (Although I used to get a ride home and back to school at lunchtime with my father because he and I both preferred having lunch at home rather than at work or school)
You lucky duck. First day of school already! I’m jealous. Seriously, I hope all goes well.
I’m going to be really happy soon – getting the kids and all their friends back in school. One more day to go, then I’m free! Ahhh… I’m looking forward to the peace and quiet, the decrease in housework and arguments, and the decrease in the food budget since we won’t have so many thirsty/hungry young people hanging around. I’m sure I’ll miss those tweenagers – next month.
I remember school starting after Labor Day too. And I don’t remember so many holidays/conferences/in-service days off either.