Driving down the freeway from school today, I saw a billboard for Razorfest.

Seriously? Razorfest?

The Razorbacks are the local sports team. I feel sure that this is the reference, and that it is not in fact a festival where people slice things up with razors.

But shouldn’t someone have noticed how alarming that billboard must be for strangers driving through?

It gets worse.

A few miles later there’s a billboard for Razorbraces.


These things were presumably put together by marketing companies with human clients. At no point during any of their meetings, nowhere in any memo, at no time did anyone say — “Hey, doesn’t that kind of sound like razors in people’s mouths?” “Doesn’t that suggest that we’re celebrating razors in some way?

Drivers must get terrified as they pass through our pleasant, friendly town.