We went to The Princess’s wedding last night and enjoyed it very much. The ceremony was beautiful. The officiant was the same as at #1 daughter’s wedding, and when she was speaking, it was sweet to see Son-in-law reach out for #1 daughter’s hand.
Partygirl said it was the first Protestant wedding she’d been to where she felt they got their money’s worth.
This was our former pastor, the one the kids grew up with, and she does an excellent message. Each one is specifically written for the couple being married, following her counseling with them, and there is always a certain amount of sniffling in the congregation.
Since we’ve been reading The God Delusion, I was wondering what a secular wedding would be like. Presbyterian weddings involve asking the family and the congregation if they will support the couple, so everyone gets to say “I will,” and praying that all the married couples will leave with their own vows strengthened, and singing of hymns, so what with one thing and another you get to feel involved rather than just spectate.
There were lots of people in the wedding party, and lots of processing. #1 daughter’s wedding had very little processing and lots more music. It is sort of like Andrew+numbers’s discussion about opera: is it more interesting to watch people move around, or to hear them singing? You can’t have both.
The reception was a great opportunity to catch up with friends we hadn’t seen in a while. There were some particularly charming moments: the flower girls in their fluffy tulle dresses dancing under the disco ball, the bride getting the giggles while dancing with her father, my girls’ reunion with their former youth leader, The Empress beaming away in her mother-of-the-bride outfit..
We’re having a lovely soft rainy day today. The kids are coming to church with me, we have a home-cooked lunch planned and then the tapas party, and #1 daughter has already announced her intention to provide pizza for dinner, so I am expecting a frolicsome day and a relaxing evening.
Apparently, the pizza is different in their current home in the Frozen North.
They don’t seem to have come to love it there. I asked them what they called the residents of their state (you know, like you say “Floridians,” so what did they say for the state where they live?) and they answered, in chorus, “Rude.”
Enough random persiflage. I have to clean house some more, and make breakfast, and finish up the pesto, and do some pre-prep for the sangria, and find the Sunday School lesson I prepared.
My co-leader wants to talk about whether stealing is always wrong. Since I am a moral absolutist and she appears to be leaning toward situational ethics, it should be an interesting discussion.
sounds like a very interesting discussion to come. First question is who defines morals?…
You can tell how little time I’ve spent at weddings by the fact that the “processing” baffled me for several minutes. What, I sat here wondering, is there to process at a wedding? What kind of process? Surely all the processing should have been done before the wedding. And then, belatedly, it hit me. “Oh! ProCESSing. Up and down the aisle!” Enlightenment.
Thank you for sharing the festivities with us; lovely.
Moral absolutism is a scary stance.
I had a secular wedding. It consisted of my my entrace (due to the layout at the garden, I came towards everyone) with my matron of honor. My fiance and the best man (husband of the MOH) awaited us, along with my minister. Not sure what order it all happened, but there were two readings; both were poetry although somewhat prose-like. (I have copies but haven’t look at them in a while. They were a bit unusual but fantastic.) One was read by my brother they other by our best friend (a guy). Our parents were asked to stand and whether they approved/blessed the marriage. Roger had a sermon, in which he basically told our history and said a few things about what marriage meant (based on counseling sessions we’d had with him). There was no “if anyone objects” as I objected to such a question even being considered. Then we said our vows, which we ourselves wrote. Exchanged rings. Kissed. Were presented. Walked out down the aisle. Much like a church wedding except that God, prayers, etc., weren’t mentioned. Music was provided by a violinist; there was no singing but that would have been difficult to pull off outside and w/o a program. I believe those already married were invited to remember their own vows at that time, but I don’t recall. I’ve always liked that part, but since most of those married who were present had had traditional church weddings, I’m not sure if we did that. So, well, there’s one secular wedding for you! –AnnMarie
Moral absolutism is awesome.
P.S. I know what that friend of yours means about not usually getting her “money’s worth” on Protestant weddings!! My husband’s cousin’s wedding – it took longer for the bride to walk down the isle than the actual ceremony. It was like that scene in the movie Raising Arizona – “Do you?” “Yes.” Do you?” “Yes”. “Well, okay then.”
(My wedding was half an hour long – which is short for a Catholic wedding. Normally they’re an hour or more.)
I went to a secular wedding once. It was cute, until it got to the end, where the officiant prounounced them married by “the power vested in me by the state of Missouri.” For some reason, that just struck a weird note with me. It’s like prouncing people married by the power vested in you by the Kraft Macaroni and Cheese Company. Compared to having the power to prounounce people married in the name of God, it just didn’t sound quite as binding.